La Reina grad appreciates the importance of family
By Kyle Jorrey kjorrey@theacorn.com

JANN HENDRY/Acorn Newspapers Kalynn and Lalana Aramthaveethong

For 10 long and sometimes trying years, Lalana Aramthaveethong has been there for her older sister, Kalynn, who's suffered from severe autism since birth. Autism is a neurodevelopmental disorder that manifests itself in markedly abnormal social interaction, communication ability, patterns of interests and patterns of behavior.

Giving up countless hours of her free time, Lalana, 18, has provided friendship and care for her only sibling when their mother and father are away at work-a personal commitment that's made all the difference in the life of this close-knit Simi Valley family.

"Honestly, I don't know how we would have made it without Lalana," said her mother, Maria, who works as a CPA. "And this whole time, she's never complained about being a part of this family. She realizes we have to take care of each other, and she's never seen Kalynn as a burden. She's never been ashamed to tell other people she has a sister that's autistic."

After years of having her sister there for her, Kalynn was there for Lalana Saturday at La Reina's senior class graduation in Thousand Oaks.

FINAL CHAPER-La Reina High School seniors Marissa Felson, left, Ana Flores-Sierra, center, and Caitlin Sweasey read the graduation program before the start of commencement on the school's front lawn on Saturday. La Reina, an all-girls Catholic school, graduated 83 in this year's senior class.

Braving a crowd of more than 200, Kalynn, 25, sat respectfully as Lalana and her 81 classmates crossed the stage outside the allgirls Catholic school and jubilantly received their diplomas. Breaking into a smile from time to time during the hour-long ceremony, Kalynn was unable to fully comprehend what the honor meant- just as few of Lalana's classmates are able to comprehend the amount of self-sacrifice that went into her receiving that piece of paper.

It was a proud moment for Lalana, who before the event had to calm her mother's fears about bringing Kalynn, who's prone to uncontrollable outbursts and has trouble sitting still for very long.

"I told her I thought she'd be fine since it was outdoors," Lalana said, "and I thought she should be there."

Maria agreed.

"(Lalana) really wanted her sister to share in her final moments of high school," Maria said. "It was a family event, and she wanted the whole family to be there."

Editor of the school yearbook her senior year and a member of the National Honor Society, Lalana was recognized by her teachers for always looking to lend a helping hand, whether it was volunteering extra time to create a PowerPoint presentation for the reunion picnic or staying after class with another student to give her feedback on an essay.

While taking tennis classes at nearby Moorpark College, Lalana befriended a fellow student with obsessive compulsive disorder, helping him learn the game and make a few new friends in the process, according to Nancy La Belle, La Reina's college counselor.

Lalana said she can't stop herself from reaching out to others, a trait she obviously picked up at home.

"I had one teacher tell me helping others seems to be second nature to me and I think that's exactly what it is," Lalana said. "Every day I wake up thinking, 'Hopefully, I can make an impact on somebody today.' Even if it's just helping to take papers from one classroom to another one."

Though she's found the time to take up ballroom dancing- thanks to another class she took at Moorpark College-and several other pastimes, there were many opportunities during the last 10 years that Lalana had to pass on when her parents couldn't be home to watch her sister, who returns from her daily work program at 4 p.m.

"Sure, I had to miss a few midnight movies and sleepovers, but sometimes if you set your priorities straight, there are things that come first-and my sister comes first in many cases," Lalana said.

Yet despite the frustrating battles with her sister's disease, the social functions missed, the appointments rescheduled, Lalana realizes her experience with Kalynn has shaped who she is and, in some ways, played a part in her success at La Reina.

"I wouldn't be the person I am today without her-she's taught me so much about patience, about love, about appreciating the things we do have," Lalana said. "Having my sister in my life has been a real blessing."

The time has now come for Lalana to leave home to continue her education, a transition she realizes will be very difficult for Kalynn, who knows her sister as "Baby."

"I think it might be hard in the beginning-my mom and I have been the two biggest people in her life," said Lalana, who'll be attending UC Irvine to pursue a career in chemical engineering. "She won't understand why Baby isn't here anymore."

Nevertheless, Lalana expects to return to the area when she finishes, to pursue her dreams and to help her family when they need her. One day, she said, she'd love to work for Amgen.

"A lot of people have asked me, 'When your parents pass away, who's got your sister?'" Lalana said. "Well, I've got full guardianship of her, and whatever is necessary to do to take care of her needs-first, I'll do that."