Top 10 reasons that fluoride should not be added to our water

Many parts of the country began adding fluoride to tap water 50 years ago because it helps prevent tooth decay. That's why it's also in many brands of toothpaste. Thanks to fluoridated water, people get fewer cavities.

Staff writer Stephanie Bertholdo tells us in her page 2 story that minute amounts of fluoride will soon be placed in Southern California tap water. There are, of course, pessimists just like 50 years ago. Fluoride can be poisonous, but not in the minuscule amounts that will be added to our local drinking water.

Too much of anything, by the way, including water, can kill you if you get too much of it.

Despite ample evidence that fluoride poses no threat to public health and in fact is beneficial because of decay prevention, the critics continue a crusade against fluoridated water.

Here (with our tongue firmly in cheek) are the top 10 reasons to disallow fluoride in our tap water:

10. With fewer cavities to fill, some dentists won't be able to make their Porsche payments.

9. Fluoride causes computer viruses (possibly because spell check works overtime on every occasion that we misspell fluoride.)

8. Fluoride is (and always was) a communist plot to soften our resistance to the "Red menace."

7. As demand for fluoride goes up, so does the price of gasoline. We're not sure of the connection, but it's a proven fact.

6. Many professional athletes drink fluoridated water and brush with Crest; fluoride has been shown to be a performanceenhancing drug that can be of significant value when used in a conscientiously applied program of physical fitness and regular professional care. 5. Fluoride causes cancer, just like everything else.

4. Fluoride contributes to global warming. (Don't ask.)

3. Terrorists can convert "yellow cake" fluoride into a weapon of mass destruction.

2. Fluoride causes some of the most dreaded afflictions known to man, including split ends, hangnails and restless leg syndrome.

1. Mel Gibson and Tom Cruise are addicted to fluoride and look what happened to them.